Law of Obedience Resistance: a cat's resistance varies in proportion to a human's desire for her to do something.

First Law of Energy Conservation: cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

Second Law of Energy Conservation: cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.

Law of Refrigerator Observation: if a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.

Law of Electric Blanket Attraction: turn on an electric blanket and a cat will jump into bed at the speed of light.

Law of Random Comfort Seeking: a cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in any given room.

Law of Bag/Box Occupancy: all bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.