How to Annoy a Wiccan:

1. Borrow their eyeliner and then don't give it back.

2. Snicker when the fat ones go skyclad.

3. Sharpen that dull knife of theirs.

5. Put on your best Judy Garland voice and ask "Are you a good witch, or a bad witch?"

6. Recite good poetry during ritual.

7. Tell the goddess to put up or shut up during the invocation.

8. See if they know any Hebrew attributions for, say, tarot. Then ask them _why_ they know.

9. Talk to their cat. Tell them the cat says it wants human sacrifices

10. Ask them who you have to sleep with in order to get initiated to the 3rd Degree.

11. Half way through a ritual, ask the high priestess to wake you when the sex starts...

12. Ask them to recommend a good book on the subject of Wicca. When they respond, repeat that you wanted a *good* book on Wicca.

13. When one tells you that s/he is a Witch, tell them not to be so hard on themselves.

14. Explain the difference between 'skyclad' and 'houseclad';

15. Remind them the moon has four phases, not three;

16. Wear a white rob and hood to the summer solstice. Say your swastika is just a rune.

19. Put firewood around the maypole.

20. Play poker with their tarrot cards.

21. Loan them 777, with no explaination

22. Remind them that *rede* means *suggestion*

23. Tell them Crowley wrote Gardner's Book of Shadows (true or not, it's damn funny)

24. Ask that guy why he's wearing a dress...

25. Bring an electric guitar to a drum circle